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[assassin_daddy]

Jᴀᴄᴏʙ Fʀʏᴇ "I'm no criminal. I just do as I please."

 

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Comments

[redrighthanded]

I'm pretty sure if we have any left over we could fill up one of those inflatable kiddie pools and go to town

[assassin_daddy]

I seem to recall Oswald did that for a Fight Night a while back- couldn't get it out of my hair for days.

[redrighthanded]

bet it looked good on you though

[assassin_daddy]

I think it was the fact I was naked and covered in sweat too that did it for most people.

[redrighthanded]

oh well yeah, that'll work

so are you gonna recreate it at the party we're throwing?
Chris might come, but he's kinda nervous

[assassin_daddy]

Im not sure how many of your guests really want to see an old man naked and covered in lube.

[ A momentarily pause before the "..." appear again.]

But I'm sure you and Chris will persuade me.

[redrighthanded]

every time you call yourself old you make me feel ancient, kiddo

we can do our best
maybe show you how much you've still got going for you no matter how many scars you've picked up

[assassin_daddy]

I think you wear it better. Less wrinkles and grey hair. And far less scars.

I know you two at least don't mind so much. So hopefully we'll get some private time together in this vat of lube.

[redrighthanded]

we can always take it up to the bedroom for a while if you wanna get away from everyone else
you know, host's privilege

[assassin_daddy]

Hosts privilege huh? That sounds like an offer I cant refuse. What other benefits are there to sucking
on up to the host?

[redrighthanded]

first pick of the pancakes in the morning
and whatever else you wanna eat

[assassin_daddy]

How can I refuse? That's too good an offer.

[redrighthanded]

good

Harley said she wants to run a train on me as well
I think that means she wants to see a bunch of people line up to take a turn on me
so if you want to be part of that, I'd be pretty happy about it

[assassin_daddy]

You mean queue up? How very civilised.

Can we get back in the queue after our turn?

[redrighthanded]

I think you definitely should
though if you want you can pick when you get to take your turn

[assassin_daddy]

Well, you know me. Always eager to go first.

[redrighthanded]

you got it

I'm glad you were my first guy, you know
still feels kinda like a struck a home run on the first try

[assassin_daddy]

I didn't know I was. But I'm glad you feel like that. I'm not sure I'm a "home run", whatever that is. Maybe more a "run home and don't tell your mother" sort.

I know I wasn't quite myself when I hit on you in the middle of the road like I did. Never regretted it though.

[redrighthanded]

remind me to teach you about baseball sometime

I've never regretted it either, babe
even when I had to go fetch you off the top of a table in the middle of a party

[assassin_daddy]

[ And the memory of that hits him like the express from Edinburgh. ]

....oh fuck

Shit. I did stand on a table and make an arse of myself. And embarass you.

I am so sorry I did that Hellboy. Christ.

[redrighthanded]

you didn't embarrass me

it was kind of cute really
you had a lot of feelings you needed to get out, that's all

[assassin_daddy]

From what I can remember I was off my face, out of my mind and out of order.

But... if you've forgoven me for it, I'm glad.

I dont think I've stood on a table since. Thank fuck.

[redrighthanded]

I forgave you for it right when it happened, babe

you could stand on a table again if you want
maybe this time doing something other than shouting about stuff

[assassin_daddy]

perhaps I might. Got any tables at this orgy of yours?

[redrighthanded]

pretty sure there will be
maybe I can find a different way to get you off it