She told Jesus only days ago that he's the only one in this entire city that she trusts enough not to feel insane around; who, by his very existence and the fact she doesn't have to explain anything to him, makes her feel more stable, more confident that she didn't just dream the insanity of their world. She knows she didn't, but sometimes other people say or do things that grate so strongly on her, that she has such an instinctive reaction to as wrong, that she begins to wonder if she's the one that's missing something.
Normally she lets it go. But they're trying to build a partnership here, and she isn't good at it, but she knows that going in on bad faith brings disastrous results. So she hesitates, draws a deep breath, and leans on the trust she has for Jesus in his ability to see things she doesn't - and on the things Jacob has told her, that she believed he meant at the time. She tries.
"There's something you need to understand about me, if this is going to work. And I'm not... looking for approval, or an opinion on it, or advice. I know myself. I don't really care if other people think this makes me a bad or a good person or any of that. I know what works for me." She doesn't have the contract in front of her, so she gestures around the apartment to bring the city and its bullshit into the conversation.
"This is a place that still gets away with something as arbitrary as laws. Where a piece of paper and what it says on it still matters enough that people, large groups of people, act on it. But I'm from somewhere that all that broke down. All that went out the window the second there was no one to support it - and a piece of paper is just a piece of paper, and a law is just an idea until someone else enforces it. All there is for me, what matters most to me, is what is and what isn't."
If it sounds harsh that's because it is, because at its foundation Rosita's world is black and it is white and grey is a luxury she tries to shade in but doesn't always manage.
"Ownership of the Hollow may be in question because of a name on a piece of paper, and because a group of people choose to believe in an idea. But as far as I'm concerned it's yours, because it's yours. Full stop." There's more, but she needs to be sure she's being clear on this, that he understands this - because it translates to the contract, too, which is more of the same.
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Date: 2022-10-24 11:11 pm (UTC)Normally she lets it go. But they're trying to build a partnership here, and she isn't good at it, but she knows that going in on bad faith brings disastrous results. So she hesitates, draws a deep breath, and leans on the trust she has for Jesus in his ability to see things she doesn't - and on the things Jacob has told her, that she believed he meant at the time. She tries.
"There's something you need to understand about me, if this is going to work. And I'm not... looking for approval, or an opinion on it, or advice. I know myself. I don't really care if other people think this makes me a bad or a good person or any of that. I know what works for me." She doesn't have the contract in front of her, so she gestures around the apartment to bring the city and its bullshit into the conversation.
"This is a place that still gets away with something as arbitrary as laws. Where a piece of paper and what it says on it still matters enough that people, large groups of people, act on it. But I'm from somewhere that all that broke down. All that went out the window the second there was no one to support it - and a piece of paper is just a piece of paper, and a law is just an idea until someone else enforces it. All there is for me, what matters most to me, is what is and what isn't."
If it sounds harsh that's because it is, because at its foundation Rosita's world is black and it is white and grey is a luxury she tries to shade in but doesn't always manage.
"Ownership of the Hollow may be in question because of a name on a piece of paper, and because a group of people choose to believe in an idea. But as far as I'm concerned it's yours, because it's yours. Full stop." There's more, but she needs to be sure she's being clear on this, that he understands this - because it translates to the contract, too, which is more of the same.