"You've said that before," Jacob replies, amused. "And you do the same to me. You just have to live with the fact you know me and I know you." He doesn't mind that Chris can read him, and guess his thoughts with more accuracy than most. It's good, to feel... known. Understood. He hasn't felt like that with someone for some time. Longer than he'd like to admit.

"I'm sorry I put you through that." He knows what it's like, to hold someone when they die. He knows what it's like to hold someone you love. It's just worse when it's someone you've also had to kill. But he doesn't want to think of Roth, not after so many years. Not when he's with Chris. "I know that I didn't intend to do that. I don't- I don't want to go like that."

Not in any world, not at any time. But he can imagine, being aware it was coming, and feeling safe, loved, wanted in Chris' arms. He doesn't think the cleric would have forced him away.

He shifts, his free hand finding Chris', fingers winding together, so he can squeeze him, send all the support he can that way, turning his head to look at the other man and wanting so desperately to take the pain away, replace it with the warmth of the love between them.

"Does it help, to think that death couldn't hold me back from you? That I came back to find you again?"